Steven and Sean on the Polar Bear Cam
Steven and Sean on the Polar Bear Cam

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Mixed Feelings

I check the web stats for this site only rarely, probably once a month or so. In addition to how many visitors I get, I can see how they got here.

When I checked this morning, I found this page. The journal entry was accompanied by a photo of Steven with his central line protruding from his chest.

I sat for a bit and tried to figure out how I felt about that. I really didn't object to the content on the page but the comment by one of that site's readers about being made nauseous by the photo upsets me a bit.

So I modified the photo with a message to the viewers of that page and replaced it. The original photo comes from a link in this journal entry, if you click on the words "central line" a few paragraphs down, you can see it.

The author of that page, BowlOfKaki, appears to be a female college student and aspiring writer in Singapore.

I wrote a letter to her here about the incident and she removed Steven's photo and sent me an email.

She and I are going to work this out.

- Kathleen

p.s. Steven is twelve years old today. Birthdays are not taken for granted in our house, not any more. Happy Birthday, sweet boy.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I also apologize for using your picture without asking...that was an insensitive oversight on my part. I used your son's picture simply to show people what a catheter looks like...I thought your picture would be better than an illustration because, well, cancer affects people, not drawings. I thought your pictures were beautiful in their own right, with very moving expressions...your family and friends are all very well represented...I had said to my sister, "People are amazing...this boy is amazing, for being able to smile after all he has endured."

I respect you and your family, and hope I have not brought any feelings of misgivings. Honestly, I hope I have not hurt you in any way. I do apologize on behalf of the young person's insensitivity, but I have no way of predicting how people will respond to what I write...I am truly sorry for their insensitive comment.

Truly, I apologize for causing you any hurt feelings I may have brought you...

My intent is only to spread the word about cancer. I have lost a dear, dear friend to cancer not too long ago, and this story I'm writing is an effort to deal with my feelings, and also share my (and other's) experience.

Sincere apologies.

I will keep you in my thoughts.

September 06, 2006 12:27 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

PS, I have removed the picture from my journal entry, if that is any consolation.
I hope that we can talk through this, and I can remove some of the ill feelings I unintentionally caused.
If you want to address me in private, saying anything that you wish, please write to the following email, and I will give you full attention. I do not expect you to be loving, but honest, so that you can get this off your chest, so to speak. I will try my best to help you.

No amount of words can convey how sorry I was to hear of your "mixed feelings." I hope that my actions from here can show you how I do feel, and it is my hope that we can come to an understanding.

My best regards to you and your family.


September 06, 2006 12:52 PM  

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